Having suffered for six days with an upper respiratory virus that I thought was never going to end I summoned enough energy to take Saint Marty to see Le Miz this afternoon. Now that I have a better perspective on what the word “slow” really means my respiratory problems seem like a weekend in Maui in February.
Le Miz is the Holy Grail of Musical Drama! How could the son of a pecan farmer from Between and a seamstress from Split Silk dare to make unflattering comments about this magnificent gift to musical theatre – which has now spread like a virus to the big screen.
Before my Christian friends become overheated and lambast me for missing the hidden themes of repentance and forgiveness may I tell you that Marty and I once sat on the front row of the McCormick Exhibition Hall and heard Billy Graham preach – after which thousands of lost souls came forward for repentance and forgiveness – and The Rev Graham managed to do all this in just forty minutes. A mere 140 minutes shorter than this movie.
Watching Le Miz compares favorably to watching coal turn into diamonds or smiling as Al Gore’s ocean front property sinks under the melting of Antarctica from global warming.
When I plied my craft as one of the lowest of the low professions: Car Salesman – No! Used Car Salesman – No! Bond Salesman – Yes! We used to invite our clients from the surrounding Midwestern Towns around Chicago to the Big City for cocktails and dinner in the Red Room of The Palmer House after which we walked them to their seats in the University Auditorium Orchestra Section to see Le Miz. Because our seats were also down front I was trapped twice in the clutches of Le Miz magnificence until half time – I believe the artiste’ crowd call it “intermission” – at which time we made our hasty escape.
At 67 minutes into today’s movie I feigned the need to go to the bathroom at which point Saint Marty said wait a minute buster you’re not leaving me here with this barker. If you’re leaving so am I.
As you can see Saint Marty and Uncle Larry are not big fans of Le Miz. If, however, you get the choice between a six-day upper respiratory virus or taking in this movie – choose the virus.