OK, if you are still reading this sad review you are either mocking me that “Don’t Do It” is more than two words or – heaven forbid you are beginning to understand “The Mind of Uncle Larry.” Two words couldn’t possibly summarize how bad Water Bar & Grill’s food, wine list and service was tonight.

Our friends Steve and Apryl treated us to dinner and thank God for them I recommended the place. The four of us agreed this is the WORST VALUE restaurant we can remember – period. It’s advertised as “fresh fish.” Yet nothing on the menu is from local waters. We had three apps, three salads and four entrees and I’m not going to waste your time or mine telling you how dry and mediocre they were.

I will tell you they were expensive. The “fresh fish” items, mostly from the local waters of Ecuador averaged $28 and any “topping” you wanted “only” cost $8. Add it up friends – we are talking $35 plus for a fish entree that you would be disappointed with at Duffy’s.

If you insist on dining on the PGA strip eat at JAlexander’s for half the price and twice the quality. If you want truly fresh fish and a real wine selection for a little less money stick with Captain Charlie’s Reef Grill in Juno. For fresh oysters and excellent Sushi try The Dive Bar in Jupiter. If you want great crab cakes, fabulous service and drinks – go south to Palm Beach Grill.

What ever you choose don’t make it Water Bar & Grill and no matter what don’t tell me we didn’t warn you!

Water Bar & Grill: Apps  C; Salads  C; Service C; Wine selection & value  D; Food D; Overall D.